Yesterday night I stayed a little bit late for friendster. And I came over her page. sigh. Yeah, she's my ex girlf Yen Nee. We broke up at 10/10 last year, it's more than 1 year. I almost forget everything but this pic reminds me of EVERYTHING.



... Seriously, her photos in friendster are all retarted and lala-ness zz. This one looks like she's acting cute too but it brings me back to the time when I always emo infront of her and she shows me this kind of LOOK. Yeah, exactly this kind of face. So when she shows her face like this, I will just go ahead and kiss her. fuck, if I was an emo freak, I would just kiss my screen yesterday night. lol.

Besides that, it brought me back to a very hideous .. me. I had a nightmare yesterday night. NO. I'm fucking serious here. I stared that pic for just 1 minute, I had a nightmare and I couldn't sleep after that. You know what I dreamed about?

I dreamed that she's crying in front of me. Kept crying. I don't know why.

And than when I was awake, I thought of how I treated her last time after those days we had broken up. The way I treated her was like.. 'I don't want you anymore so fuck off and get your own life..'
zzz

Until this morning, I woke up at 8am and I started to find her number. I wanted to sms her. After a few moment finally I found her number somewhere. So i sms her. Here's the conversation, I type it out exactly in my phone :

me : Do you still remember me?
Yn : Who?
me : I'm Kian Hui. Still remember?
Yn : I having tuition.. Msg u later..

After a few hours.

Yn : Anything?
me : Do you mind I msg u actually?
Yn : What would you do if I say yes?
me : Den I will just shut up.
Yn : lidat u better dun msg me lo.. i duwan sudenly got ppl call me and scold me..
me : huh? who will scold u wor? o.o
Yn : duno.. someone lar..
me : oh. I guess I get wad u mean. Anyway, can we keep in touch?
Yn : Forget bout it la.. u forgot how u treat me last time?

And than I told her everything, like I couldn't sleep last time, and all.

Yn : No thanks.. V cannot be friend anymore sorry.
me : sad to hear that.. are u still hating me? ):

Until at night only she replied, I thought she would never reply me.

Yn : Actually I not so hate u d (maybe), but it's impossible to b friends back.
me : Im sorry i was really over last time. The main thing I want to say is this. I'm really sorry, I cried last night. Seriously. Sorry.

Til now she hasn't reply. sigh. I'll post up again tomorrow if she replies me later.



Some of you may think of, why the hell you still want to apologize? it's over for 1 damn fucking year.

I know. But I was really really over. I cant stand of myself. I'm a real chicken if she doesn't accept my apology.

Fuck up of my own fucking stupid attitude I used to have last time. I shouldn't treat a girl like that, AND that was my girlf. Fuck. Sorry if I use too many foul language here.